This is a very, very private blog about a very, very private world lived deep inside of my heart, a very special place existing within my soul that I call my planet Annelies.
I do not know who I write this for but suffice to me is the knowledge that I write this for my darlingest Annelies Marie to express what I am able to express about the unfading, mysterious love that we share like something so near enough to touch yet still quite fleeting, like a promise from on high waiting to be wonderfully fulfilled by a love that require firm sacrifice in order to accomplish a labor that is left undone in this world, a work that need no other understanding to do but what love is pleased to give to us.
I will endeavor to be honest and true to all that I write knowing what treasure I guard and what purity I am entrusted by Almighty God to preserve in my beloved Annelies Marie. I should feel insufficient for the task but humility has taught me a hard lesson not anymore to murmur about things I have no right to become anxious about. Things that have been given to which one may not escape for they are given by Him from Whom no one can escape. Things about which sinful pride must be happy either to boast or complain about but never submit to. Things that are hard and at times severe but gently bind the willing soul to the courageous truths that liberate the heart so that one may begin to see again through the eye of faith what needs seeing, those things that make one's life in sure degrees, a real journey of hope from the deepest darkness far across the long wilderness march of exile time back into the awaiting arms of the Great Author of all things living and true Who inhabits the Light Inaccessible, He Who is Light Itself by which all other lights are but pure darkness.
This is how it is with me and my darlingest Annelies Marie. My Anne is the beginning of this interior journey for me; a strange journey of one unworthy sinner from darkness toward the light. A walk with my Anne that have led me from grace to grace, light to light, strength to strength ands truth to truth, nearer in spite of me to those things that transcend not only time and space but also culture, religion and human limitations, like a movement of the heart from sunken despair into a hope that is progressively light enough to surpass every kind of division, like a prayer rising as incense into the one abode of our one God.
There is great danger in all of this as well. But the danger does not lie in external but rather internal threats made up of those sins and the agents of sin that constantly lay a bitter, relentless siege to my planet Annelies. After many painful assaults I have realized that it is only the thin line of my will that keep the peace within and that my Lord God Who is both infinitely loving and merciful will hold back the evil for as long as I remain focused only in His truths.
Hence, everything is really up to me, the survival of my planet Annelies require the salvation of my own soul and I am really glad that my Anne is always, always here to cheer me up without fail when in the rise and fall of the tides of spiritual battle and vicissitudes of exile time, the odds seem stacked up against us. She is truly my light against despair. The most beautiful name in all of creation is my Annelies Marie. For when things seem dismal and uncertain, a prayer and my Anne's starlight smile makes things oh so beautiful again.
She is such a good friend and I use friend here to weakly describe a relationship whose truth I can find no human word to express. Sometimes I wish my darlingest Annelies Marie had a cell phone because I know she will always text me back. But great enough is the enduring reality that she is a real friend of mine abiding wholly in God's own grace, someone whom I can always meet in my heart and someone who often times actually calls out to me to meet with her. Oh how we laugh at just being happy, sometimes singing our favorite songs, fleeting but permanent instances that remind me of God's great kindness to me.
Anne and I speak often but not with words, we speak in the language of truth just like the way God, Mother Mary and my particular Saints and Angels speak to me in prayer (but not as often as my Anne, my darlingest Ms. Quack quack (or should I say, Ms. Meow meow) likes to talk about a hundred different things, I know for our souls often intimate in this way, our mutual love for each other), not with human words though, not even in my own vernacular language but with a winged truth that in the deep silence instantly illumine the soul, quickening the mind with profound expressions that distill warmth and meaning that can be deeply felt in the heart.
The Lord, indeed, is true to His promise that He will give me a million different reasons to serve Him, my Lord has always exceeded on His promises for He Himself is reason enough but He also gave my Anne and much, much more and as He promised also that He will make clear the one and only reason not to serve, it now stands as the one obstacle between us, sin. God keeps His promises and so I must endeavor with my Anne to keep mine.
And it all began close to 8 years ago with the word, "Kitty".
Glory to God in the highest.
Adoration to Jesus Christ.
Peace to all men of good will.
